Monday, January 25, 2016


By Sunaina Patnaik at Monday, January 25, 2016

I have been told that to be a great writer, I must abandon fear. I must forfeit second thoughts and embrace rejection and pain at every step of my life. And that I must put my heart where my mouth is. I have been constantly told that I must place myself in the most unusual situations and gain experiences. It might not have made me a great writer, but it, at least, made me write different things.

I have been told that to be a successful professional, I must network with the right people. I must not be mad about making tons and tons of friends at my workplace. I have been told that all the magic happens right out of my comfort zone, and often, I get pushed to strut out it. I might not have a cushy corner office like Harvey Specter, but I am known for the work I do.

But no one told me how to be a pro at maintaining personal relationships. You know what I mean? Each day, as I navigate my way through the relationships I've so far made with my friends, family, confidants, or just acquaintances, I know they aren't quite thrilling in all aspects. To be honest, I screw them on and off. I've always imagined that relationships are effortless. And that they must be as simple as the pleasant breeze. No, not like the gust of wind. Never. Every night when I am alone with myself, I think of all the mistakes I've made, and as I slowly tuck them into my bed, beside me, looking into their eyes, I ask myself what made me do this. Or that. Or the exact half-baked things I've said to people. I've always imagined that mistakes come from a deeply insecure place. From a place where the brain and heart are in a conflict. But they don't. Mistakes just happen. As we keep taking chances in life and meet different people, mistakes just happen. I mean, my life isn't an isolated case, right? We all make big, fat mistakes. Mistakes that we cannot take back, mistakes that we regret, mistakes that give us sleepless nights, mistakes that sucker punch us in our hearts. However, what are we without our mistakes?

We are social animals. Sure, we receive a cartload of professional advice but no one teaches us how to deal with personal life only because it's not algebra. You learn only when you make mistakes. Only when you choose courage over comfort. You learn that maintaining relationships is not effortless and will never be. You got to wake up every morning, pick them and work hard to make them stay strong.

And tonight, when you are tucking your mistakes into the bed beside you, don't forget to tell them a hi. Don't you forget to thank them for making you strong! Don't you forget to express your gratitude that you're no longer a dick only because of them. For they have been teaching you all that you haven't learned in school or college.



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