Thursday, May 26, 2016

Twenty-First Vs. Twenty-Fifth.

By Sunaina Patnaik at Thursday, May 26, 2016 2 comments

It was 2012. My twenty-first birthday was slowly approaching. I carefully picked a pink dress and a got a haircut I regretted for weeks. It was just around four years but it indeed feels like a distant time with everything different. I was a different person too.

It was a significant year of my life. I was graduating, I had a couple of college admissions in hand, I was yet to take up my first job and I was highly indecisive about what to do with my life. I was not willing to settle down for mediocrity but my twenty-first year was just about that -- settling for mediocrity - in terms of love, life, friendships, and more importantly, the career.

It is 2016. My twenty-fifth birthday is fast approaching. I carefully picked a lot of dresses this year and was wise enough not to get a haircut like every birthday. I'm such a different person now. From choosing mediocrity to fighting adamantly for what I truly believe in, I sure have evolved into a person that was alien to my twenty-one-year-old self.

At twenty-one, I was largely apprehensive about the new path of life, bigger responsibilities, and tougher challenges. I was worried that I was growing older and that the best years of my life were simply behind me. Now, what can I say about turning twenty-five? Four years older, wiser and with more feathers in my hat, should I be more worried that I am soon hitting the later years of the twenties and life is just never going to be the same again? But why do I feel like the best days of my life are right ahead of me? That they are beckoning me with sweet promises and bitter miseries. All of it would still be worth it, though. Won’t it?

When I was a child, I was told sternly that time does not stop for anyone. Sure, I believed it for a lot of years only to realize that the myth could be altered. Time would stop, walk, and run with you only if you value it as much as you value yourself. If only you grow along with it.

Now I know that being twenty-five isn't being old.  There is so much to see. So much to learn. So much to live. And not to forget, there is so much time.

At this point, however, I'd like to worry about the birthday dress that a certain someone picked for me. It doesn't zip up well, but I am completely in awe of it. Oh, the little curveballs life throws at us in the middle of happy realizations and moments!


By Sunaina Patnaik at Thursday, May 26, 2016 2 comments

We occupied a center table at a coffee shop we'd never visit again.
Just like the colours of the coffee shop, he was in white and I was in bright orange.
Several cups of coffee were served at our table and cleared too, but our conversations never ceased.
Time never stalled for us.
Everything around us was moving at a quick pace, dusk turned into a tender night, and the people around us were in a haste to leave.
But we were stuck in a moment when everything moved in a slow motion.
We were stuck in a place where time did not count.

Sunday, May 22, 2016


By Sunaina Patnaik at Sunday, May 22, 2016 1 comments

We are all greedy people.
We are barely content with the things we have. We always run behind the things that seem attractive. Momentarily, but not forever.
The should haves, the could haves, the would haves -- we talk about them with such a desire in our eyes failing to notice the beauty in the things that we already own.
Why do we never appreciate what we have? Why do we go blind about the wonderful people in our lives?
And more importantly, why do we lose sight of the shore while mourning over a fleeting glimpse of a distant land that will never shelter us?

Wednesday, May 18, 2016


By Sunaina Patnaik at Wednesday, May 18, 2016 0 comments

Stay longer.
Live longer. Start living the life you've always wanted.
Your pain will fade.
Your hope will resurrect.
You will find joy again.
You will survive this. You will fight this struggle.

Stay longer.
Live longer. Start living for the world you created.
You will discover love.
You will seek comfort in music.
You will lose yourself in dance again.
You will endure this battle. You will find your strength.

Stay longer.
Live longer. Start living for the heart that beats inside you.
You will walk the paths you've never walked before.
You will run ahead of everyone in time.
You will leave your name behind. Your life will find a deeper meaning.

But for all of this and more, for all that is said and unsaid, you need to stay longer.
And live longer.

Friday, May 13, 2016

Growing Up.

By Sunaina Patnaik at Friday, May 13, 2016 0 comments

The longest and most productive weeks are often the ones that breeze past us in a jiffy. You cannot fathom when the week begins and ends. And all of it in the blink of an eye. When I was a lot younger, I always assumed that when I'd finally do a job I love, time would stall. I figured that I would be able to taste every moment of it just the way I enjoy my cup of coffee. Funnily I also believed that the job I love would come only with the choicest of work that suits my interests. You assume a lot of things when you are young, don't you?

Lately, a minor part work that's coming my way doesn't interest me and maybe, just maybe, it's largely influencing the paramount of work that I otherwise enjoy.

So, what's this all about? When you finally take up a job you love, do you generally expect it to be brilliant on all days alike? Do you always hope that it comes in the form that is acceptable to you and only to you? I mean, I always hoped for it -- especially because I could be quite rigid and adamant when it comes to doing anything that doesn't thrill me. It might seem to be an awfully painful experience to convince me to write something I hate. Something I don't want to be associated with. Something that tests my patience even during a good night sleep. And more importantly, something that pushes me out of my comfort zone.

It just does not work that way.

The slightly older, almost 25-year-old version of me definitely knows that even the things you love come with a lot of flaws. Just like how your favourite triple chocolate sundae comes with a bad case of cold. You still savour it. You still crave it.

That's exactly the thing about growing up. Despite knowing that it comes with cons, you still adore it.

Monday, May 02, 2016


By Sunaina Patnaik at Monday, May 02, 2016 0 comments

Get your heart broken. 
It's the best thing that could happen to you.
You'll never know what love is until someone crushes your heart.
Pour yourself some cheap wine and gulp down your sorrows.
Drown. Just drown in the ocean of pain. You'll learn how to swim gracefully.
Let out all your tears till you grow familiar with them.
Risk your heart. It was made to be broken only.
Heartbreak is glorified in countless forms.
Musicians write songs about it.
Poets pour their words into it.
Artists need it for their art.
However, our heart does not ache for it the way it does for love.
Forever cautious, we carefully guard it against destruction.
But then how would the heart grow fonder if it doesn't break?

Sunday, May 01, 2016


By Sunaina Patnaik at Sunday, May 01, 2016 0 comments

The windows on the fourth floor were slowly unbolted,
The speeding car on the street leisurely came to a halt,
The child in red and his mother huddled under a black umbrella,
The cats were nowhere to be seen but the dogs were frisky,
The streets were almost desolate and looked spotlessly clean,
The trees looked greener and the flowers were dangling up above,
And as I stood on my balcony with a cup of coffee in my hand,
It looked like everyone was savouring the first rush of rain.

Us Against the World.

By Sunaina Patnaik at Sunday, May 01, 2016 0 comments

It is said that best friends are exactly alike. Birds of a feather. Two minds thinking as one. Funnily enough, my best friend and I are strikingly opposite in myriad ways. While she has a big smile wrapped on her face forever, I could be grumpy often. While she is up for all the fun things, I am found to be rather unwavering about the kind of fun I want to have. Despite the several differences, we both have our share of common space where our thoughts meet the way Sun meets the horizon. We are happy with just that. We are extremely happy with sharing silence on our drives back home or indulge ourselves in weird banter at highly loud places. She does not mind when I fall asleep early during our sleepovers. Always. I do it always - as if it's a ritual. And I don't get annoyed (Or maybe I do) when she arrives late every time we make plans. Nevertheless, she does it. We aren't the sort who break our rituals and habits. They die hard.

The previous week was particularly eventful. My best friend got married and obviously, it was one of the most emotional moments for me. To look at her stunning face and the joy written all over it. To see her so happy, giggling like a schoolgirl, resembling the girl I met eight years ago. We have been friends for a long time now and as I look back, I am surprised at the amount of things we have done together or the number of places we have been to. We have explored our way through college and the first rush of internships, we have ventured into our first jobs together and invested in many mindless things aimlessly. We spent too much, we felt too much, we cared too much and broke ourselves too much. But we always found each other in the worst situations too. I told you, it's a colossal amount.

Being friends with someone for eight years comes with a lot of pros and cons - your best friend slowly turns into your family, and when that truly happens, you turn fiercely protective of them. Often imagining that their wedding would result in a dramatic separation from you. Fun fact: It's not true. Sure, you might weep some nights wondering if your best friend is going to fly away from you and you eat tubs of ice-cream hoping you'd soon get used to doing things alone, but they'll only remind you that be it something as silly as eating cookies and cream ice-cream or ranting about the love of your life, you'll find them right beside you. Inevitably.

And finally, my best friend, you know who you are. Because you are the only one. Thank you for being such a lovely friend, and as you walk this new path with your certain someone, I cannot be happier for you. We have seen so much together and there is a long way to go. I love you and you matter so much to me, but more importantly, I want you to know that you complete me.


Title of the post inspired from Coldplay's Us Against the World

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