Friday, March 14, 2014

Is Love Losing Its Grandeur?

By Sunaina Patnaik at Friday, March 14, 2014

I'm in love with you, and I'm not in the business of denying myself the simple pleasure of saying true things.”
-John Green 
After a long day of work, my friend and I found some free time at the end of the day when we had a brief conversation on how the essence of love, the most overrated yet underrated emotion, has been changing over the past few years. It is quite astonishing that the only emotion that makes anything possible is losing its immortality.

How? Let me tell you how.

Let us not talk about the fairy tales, the romantic comedies, or the fictional stories that promise you the happy endings. Let us not talk about fantasies or the fragments of imagination. Let us talk about the real stuff. The profound stuff, as an intellect might want to say. Let us talk about how love has shamefully transformed from whoa to ugh.

To be precise, let us talk about how people have transformed from being beautiful to being vile in the name of changing times. No, do not talk about being practical. No, don't just get me started. Shhh, just listen to me. 

Let us, for a moment, forget all the fables and talk about our parents. Our parents lived in the era-the early 90s, when everything was limited, luxuries were expensive, communication was finite. Of course, they lead a far splendid lives than ours and it makes me shudder to actually say that relationships were everlasting in their era. How many sorts of communication did they even have? They did not have Facebook, WhatsApp, and Instagram. No social media at all. Nada!

I vividly remember all the days when my father would stay months away from home, and my mother would wait for one phone call that would come at 8 P.M. and the days when my mother would go to her native place, my father would look at the clock anticipating a similar phone call.

Do you remember the days people wrote letters to their lovers, stayed away from each other for months yet were together? Do you know of the times when every problem had a solution? The days when lack of communication hardly mattered; the days when people had to put up a tough fight to attain something they really needed.

These days, luxury is affordable, communication is forever happening, and lovers stay in touch all the time. Like, seriously! In spite of having everything together, why are people of our generation failing in loving people? Why are we falling flat in putting someone else's interests above our's? 

When you fall in love with a person, you will have to accept the fact that you will face severe adversities. Love is melancholic too. Would you let go of someone just because it is painful? How do you think our parents survived the distance without any mode of communication? Don't you think the people in the archaic times fell in love? If it wasn't worth it, trust me, nothing would have existed. Nothing!

In a world where it is possible to find the most distant star in the Universe, is it too much to ask for true love unabashedly?

And before you go back to whatever you were doing, I would like you to ask yourself one thing.

Is love losing its grandeur?


Ritesh Agarwal on 14 Mar 2014, 09:22:00 said...

Hi there...This is my first visit to your blog and something tells me there are many more to come, provided you would let me in :)

I agree with what you said there...In fact, for the past many months I have been trying to shout my lungs, heart and kidneys out telling people not to treat love the way you treat ball points- just use them for a few days and replace them.... i am glad i found a voice in u

Sunaina on 14 Mar 2014, 18:41:00 said...

@Ritesh: Thanks a lot. :)

Jemina on 17 Mar 2014, 10:57:00 said...

Might seem lame and totally boring that even with all the modes of communication out there my ex and I preferred mailing each other. We did meet and spoke on phone but our relationship was more then that. We never felt that there was a need to be insecure about anything. And after a relation of three years we did let each other go not coz because we weren't in love anymore but because it was for the best at that time and none of us regrets it. That relationship made us better and we have only the good memories to cherish. No baggage carried and no mess to repent. I still smile at times when I open my email id and the inbox says (4731)...
So from the personal experience I would say that love isn't losing its grandeur..:)

Sunaina on 17 Mar 2014, 11:18:00 said...

@Jemina: Isn't that great? :) Good for you.

Anonymous said...

"Strangely amongst all those 2-Dimensional people out there on the beach, I connected to no one, and this is quite obvious. In the vast sea of people, I imagined flickers of the faces of people I knew and it hit me that of all the people I knew in my life, out of all the thousands of people, the only people who knew me truly, as I was, are my parents right from my birth to the growing years.
During those times, they were my absolute caretakers and I, in my infancy didn't develop the tools to mask myself yet. Once I grew up and started communicating with other human beings, I started lying to fit into cycle of rules and social etiquette as those ages demanded. As time passed, that lying demon took a much more complex shape, to a point where there are two distinct people within me, one social and the other personal. I think you understand what I just said. This is the point where I will generalize saying that this is a phase as experienced by everybody, because no matter how hard we try, it is difficult to express the absolute truth almost always.

I wouldn't call it a lie, I would just call it the untruth. If on a deeper level we all are beings of untruth (as opposed to the beings of truth we are taught to be). Now this brings us to the point of trust. Trust is what we define as something two or more people have on the common platform of absolute truth. I trust X (how? don't ask me, I just trust you) but we know that X and her personality are firmly built on the truths as well as the untruths. So, if no person is ever completely truthful, then love, which is universally accepted as something that's built on mutual trust is false.

Long story short, for that moment which stuck like eternity to me, I felt that everyone's alone, in that grand cacophony, everyone who was smiling and clicking photographs, everyone including me. We were all lying and utterly alone, with our silent realization that love died or didn't live in the first place."

Sunaina on 22 Mar 2014, 06:48:00 said...

@Anonymous: I agree.

Thanks for stopping by. :)


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