Thursday, April 20, 2017

What If?

By Sunaina Patnaik at Thursday, April 20, 2017

I've always wondered what is it that I wanted from you,
the questions were many,
the answers, none,
so what is it that I wanted from you?
did I desire the luxury of first taking your name every morning?
the roundness of your name, the simple joy of pronouncing it, syllable by syllable,
maybe I did want a little more than that,
for instance sitting across you with coffee and newspapers between us,
the mundanity of life that would have seemed better with our quirks,
actually, your quirks,
so what did I really want from you?
not certainty and never a peace of mind,
maybe I pined for the lavish comfort of just looking into your honey-coloured eyes at nightfall,
or count the stars without the worry of the daylight,
see, the problem is,
even after all these years, I'm still unsure and nonplussed about what I'm looking for,
in you,
the person who makes me want to abandon all my whims and caprices,
but then, stop, listen to the silence between us,
it's only growing and sometimes, growling,
are you feeling what I'm feeling?
or is this just a figment of my silly little imagination?
I don't know what tomorrow brings,
but what if it brings me?
maybe that's what, that's really what I want to know.



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