Welcome to the World of Delusion!

India is a wonderful, wonderful country. We are meticulously outstanding in almost every sector and when I talk about every sector, well, I mean every sector, and delusion happens to be just one of those sectors. Sweet life! Of course, no country is perfect. Every country has flaws but we have mastered this art. Totally!

We marinate ourselves in various fallacies (All of us do. No one is an exception), and like the American Dream, our Indian Dream is quite a tale. And here we go...

It is a universal truth that most of the Indians are engineers. Well, I appreciate the fact that India is the country that produces the highest number of engineers every year but let us not get carried away with that, okay? "Only engineering can fetch you a job ya! Because medicine is too challenging, do engineering and get into an MNC ya! Arts does not fetch you a cushy job with a fat pay-check." This is a very common house-hold statement. What is it that we hold against Arts? I mean, really. If your child really wants to be a techie, well, let him be, and if he wants to be an artist, do not stop him. Just get over this engineering fad, alright. Hello parents, are you listening? 

We are shamelessly unaware of the American and English organizations. We want our children to work for Indian MNCs like we owe them something. I have this friend who works for Electronic Arts (EA), and EA is supposed to be the big daddy of the gaming industry and his relatives ask, "Why can't you work for Infosys? What is EA, anyway?" *Poker face* And yes, our folks have another misconception: An engineer can get into any organization. And do anything. I am a computer science engineer and no, I certainly don't know why the air conditioner is acting strange. Give me a break!

Women are supposed to master the culinary skills. And do you know what happens if they don't? They simply don't get married. Aila! It is strange how a woman is assessed on the basis of her culinary skills, dressing skills, the number of guy friends she has, the sort of the college she goes to and the metaphors. And everything has to be perfect. No sir, we are not Aamir Khan. We have our own trepidations, endowments, dignity and stuff. Yes, cooking for your man is not a wrong thing but that is not the only thing and if you say a woman's place is still in the kitchen, please, just hang yourself.

People from the same community flock and breed and whatever together! I know, that is hopeless. But this is India and we are in a sad state. I don't understand, what is it about this community, religion, caste system? Yes, apart from the foolishness, what is it really about? If Mahatma Gandhi and Ambedkar revisit our country now, they would be astonished. Wouldn't they just think that our country hasn't improved even a wee bit ever since their demise? I believe they would, because, we have been developing since decades. On a serious note, we talk about globalization, we brag about modernization, we discuss how our country can progress, we blame our neighbouring countries for a decline in our development rate and that is it, talking is all that we can do. We do not realize that it us. Well, this belief cannot change overnight but hasn't it been too many nights? Take a break, guys! Or I might just come out with another post-The Never-ending saga of Indian parents and their drama. The drama is just so mainstream, and weird and, oh yes, you lost me at your nugatory thought.

Our politicians lecture about secularism (My foot!) but they don't follow it. They are religion/community/caste/sub-caste/same surname (if there is such thing) obsessed, and it is such a shame that these people get elected and stand as the role-models of our country. I am vexed with this system but...truth be told, we choose our Government. So, yeah!!!

I wish I could write more but yawn, this is just getting too long and I don't want anyone to stop reading mid-way. Tata!

And oh, this is our Indian dream-an engineering qualification, a cushy job, a partner of parents' choice, and then, parents decide when you should bring a new life into existence, then, sadly, life is almost done living your parents' dream (Oops! The Indian dream) and we die in peace! Sweet, sweet life!

Disclaimer: India is my country and I love it. I hold no disrespect against anyone. No, I swear!  

What's with the Wedding Bug?

“People go on marrying because they can't resist natural forces, although many of them may know perfectly well that they are possibly buying a month's pleasure with a life's discomfort.” 

― Thomas Hardy

Okay, so be it! How much ever you might want to disagree with me (Actually, Thomas Hardy) on this, you know somewhere deep down, it is true. Not in all cases, but in many cases. Marriage is not a gamble and it is funny how people gamble with their lives in the name of marriage. Well, not everyone, but there a few exceptions.

I am astonished! I open Facebook and scroll through my news-feed and see people getting married/engaged, school-mates inviting me to their weddings and all and it actually made me wonder, "Are we like SO old?" And I knocked myself out with a hammer and started pondering over this thingy. Is it like so darn easy for them to get hitched to a stranger? God! It is so creepy. 

On a serious note, I would want to shake you and drag you into senses. Hey, would you just want to be yoked to some stranger without even knowing him? What if he listens to Taylor Swift? What if she is an alien to cleanliness? What if he wears yellow socks? What if she acts indifferent in the later part of your marital life? What if he is so incompatible with you that you dread when he comes home from work? What if she makes fun of your dreams? What if he does not stand by your side in times of dire need? What if she is not the woman of your dreams? What if you have conflicting opinions all the time? What if? No, really, what if? Scary, right? And if you belong to the category who thinks these things are not the exact deal-breakers, then, let me just suggest you something, you know, you might just do yourself a favour and refrain yourself from reading any further. Mark my words, dear!

Practically, your wedding day, the D day is supposed to be the most important day in your life and if you are truly lucky enough, you don't have to go through this ordeal twice or more, or whatever. We all need to ask ourselves some major questions, and hey, it is a serious thing, you know, it ain't funny.

Do you want to be married just because your long lost cousin's mother wants you to be a married man? Do you want to wear those silk sarees and heavy jewelry just because your community (Haha!) demands it? Do you want to spend the rest of your life, fifty years, to be precise, with someone just because your freaking family wants you to? Frankly, your family just pays fat cash for your wedding. They obviously won't spend fifty years of their life with your life partner.

I digress.

Back to the story. So, yes, do you really want to sit on those red thrones and look like fools who'd be doomed for an eternity? Do you realize that they are so old school? Do you want to be with someone who is as incompatible as Billy Joe Armstrong and Miley Cyrus would be? Do you, for a moment, give it a serious thought and realize the gravity of the situation? Oh girl, you do know that this is like a once in a lifetime thingy, right? Why marry someone who does not care for you? Why marry someone just for the heck of settling down? Do you want to sigh every-time you look at that big rock on your finger? Twenty years down the line, do you want to regret that you have plainly wasted your life on a person who never deserved you? 

Goodness gracious! I know, I am freaking out but I need to let this out. It is your day, wear what you really want to wear. Yes, the diamonds. Yes, that dress by Sabyasachi Mukherji. Yes, get your hair done like a rock star. Yes, you are listening! You want a beach wedding? Just freaking have a beach wedding under the stars. No, don't listen to that aunt who does not give two cents about your life. Yes, get that photographer and go for fancy photo-shoots. Aren't you like really bored of the oh-so-yesterday poses? Trust me, this is your day! Your parents, your friends, your confidantes will suggest and advice a lot. Be wise and act sane. IT IS YOUR FREAKING DAY.

Be with someone who is ready to stand by your side no matter what, who holds your arm and assures you (Okay, you might find this so Jane Austenish or Sophie Kinsellish but would you just care to shut up? Yes, thank you!)  and someone who is perfect with all the above listed imperfections. They might not be such deal-breakers after all. You never know! ;-)

So What Makes Us a Better Writer?

“No tears in the writer, no tears in the reader. No surprise in the writer, no surprise in the reader.” 

― Robert Frost

Truth to be told, we do not have any rules to turn into better (or say, awesome) writers overnight. But how I wish we had, you know, drink some magic potion and voila! You are a better writer. Unfortunately, it does not work out like that. Sigh! 

So, this is how it all started, I look at my old (like, really old blog-posts) and go, eww! And the current posts seem to be doing better than the previous ones. And well, it works for all of us, nay? We keep getting better with every post/article. Though we do not have any rules, there are some practices that we can adopt. For instance, here we go:

1) Read a lot:

Reading is such an inspiration, isn't it? We all learn a lot from reading. You know, whenever we  write, we must take sometime to read a good book before that. The books by your favourite writer, perhaps? I read Austen, Ruskin Bond, or some random articles by Manu Joseph and oh boy, do they help me or do they help me? ;-)

2) Experience:

One must experience everything they do. I say, feel everything you do, feel the aroma and the taste of the food you eat, feel the places you visit, feel the emotions, the pain you go through and all. And put down those feelings on paper. The exact feelings!

3) Write everyday:

One of the best practices of writing is to write everyday. We should make it a habit to write five hundred words a day. The more, the better!

4) Meet different people:

Every person has a story to tell. Meet different people, communicate with them, share a tale or two and analyze everything. You have so many different stories now. And if you think this is plagiarizing, let me just tell you one thing-SHUT UP!

5) Imagine a lot:

Imagination is the driving force behind everything. Be it art or creativity, imagination is everything. At some point of time, we need to let go of our thought and surrender ourselves to the power and senses of imagination and you know what? It works all the time. Perfectly at that. 

6) Coffee, my love:

No coffee, no creativity! Repeat. No coffee, no creativity.

Your brain so works well when you drain down some coffee into your system.

7) And what about movies?

Of course, movies add so much. Yes, the crappy ones too. They teach you what a bad story is. But honestly, no story is bad. Every story is meant to be told.

And the good movies, your favourite movies inspire you SO much. No, really!

Now, I am done and if you guys have any ideas, do share them. Ciao!

It Is Not a Cake-walk, Baby!

"I love you. You complete me."

"Shut up. Just shut up. You had me at hello."

-Jerry Maguire

So, I sit down with a tub of ice-cream and watch Jerry Maguire. I love this movie for two reasons-Tom Cruise and the movie is epic, isn't it?

Basically, I am a sucker for romantic comedies. Of course, I do like the occasional superhero movies, horror and goth, and the like but the movie section of my laptop is majorly filled with romantic comedies. 

I am quite intrigued by the 90s movies..you know Pretty Woman, Jerry Maguire, When Harry Met Sally(1989 though), Before Sunrise and I wonder if things have massively changed in the 2000s. And frankly, they have! Things have changed from "It must have been love" in 'Pretty Woman' to "You spin my head right round" in 'The Ugly Truth' and it makes me go oww! 

That is the moment I started relating things with reality. Have the times changed too? Well, yes, they have. I mean, do we still have those people who say, "I will stick to you through dreadful misery and stand by your side in the gloomy times"? Or is it just that all I see are those who say, "Hey you know what? We held onto each other in all the joy and mirth. Why stick to each other during pain? Let us choose the easy way out and chuck out all the drama, trauma and yeah, whatever. So we done?"

Of course, it is not so simple, right? We all go through problems. Crappy problems, messy problems, problems that do not even come into the vicinity of problems, tiny problems, and the metaphors! The other day, my friend updated a huge Facebook status for her boy-friend. She was questioning his love for her on a social networking site for not recharging her damned mobile phone on time. DUH!!!! Really? Is that even a problem? Girl, do you actually know what a problem really is?

I don't know! We all live in this selfish, cynical world and we never give a thought about what is worth and what is not. Isn't it simple? I mean, seriously, would you want to lose someone so close to you just for a recharge card? It is not about the recharge card, actually. It is about letting minute things spoil our relationships. Not just with our partners or whatever but with our friends too. 

We all make mistakes. Isn't it? I have done tons of them and yes, I know, writing this post does not make me a saint. I jump to the worst conclusions in a matter of seconds and mess up with my head. And by the time, I realize what I have done, it is too late. The damage is already done, nay? What could you do about it? Honestly, nothing! But you do not stop cribbing either.

So, well, may be, we should all give a lot of thought before blowing up things, and you know, updating silly Facebook statuses that are nothing but cringe-worthy. As an after-thought, you can actually tweet about them. Ha! Anyway, we should just think and act. Like..like...umm...you know the way we act when we do Math? 

Relationships add so much to your life. Likewise, they pull a lot away. It is for us to decide if it worth it. Love does not need hard work but sustaining the complications and the plights need a lot of hard work and you should be ready to do it every freaking day. 

You do not have to open the pandora's box and say, "Hey, it is easy." Instead, say, "It is horrid but I shall find a way out" for relationships are not a cake-walk, baby!

Love a Guy who...

Love a guy who enjoys the little things in his life and makes a big deal about the joyous moments. Love a guy who loves the smell of the earth when it rains and enjoys an ice-cream with it. He will make sure that you experience all the little things in your life. Even better, he will make you appreciate all those little things. Love a guy who knows what you love to eat, love a guy who knows what you do when you are cross, love a guy who knows how to please you when you are down. That guy will do everything to bring a smile on your face.

Love a guy who takes you to interesting places to eat, love a guy who shares his yummy pasta with you and enjoys every spoon, love a guy who takes you for a long drive and treats you your favourite flavour of ice-cream, Belgian Dark Chocolate. Yummy! And yet, he makes sure that you eat his favourite flavour of ice cream. Love a guy with whom you can enjoy every moment including the fights and the arguments. Love a guy who loves pictures..he will make every moment amazing. Love a guy who makes your morning coffee time memorable.

Love a guy who fights with you for your time, love a guy who understands your mood swings and does not make a fuss about it, love a guy who gives you a bar of chocolate when your mood is taking a toll on you and smiles at you when you trip on that chocolate. Love a guy who takes you to his favourite places and makes you a part of his memories..that guy will make you a part of your life and that is the biggest step for him.

Love a guy who knows your favourite writer and understands it completely when you quote her, love a guy who takes an interest in the books you read and the things you do, love a guy who picks the clothes and shoes for you and honestly, it makes him very happy. Love a guy who acts paranoid when he cannot get that favourite piece of thing for you and see the disappointment on his face. Doesn't it make you go, OMG?

Love a guy who is creative, love a guy who takes a deep interest in art and of course, your hobbies. He is making an effort to be a part of your life. Love a guy who knows what he has to do with his life and he will make sure you are a part of it. Love a guy with whom you can cuddle on a lazy Sunday afternoon, love a guy who complains a lot while watching your favourite chic-lit yet watches it with you because it makes you happy. 

Love a guy who wakes you up early in the morning to show you his favourite sunrise spot and takes you to his favourite place to eat the breakfast, love a guy who holds your arm when he drives, love a guy who steals glances at you when you are doing your work. 

Love a guy who loves food and you know what to do when is angry at you, love a guy who takes his time to read a book to enjoy the plot...

In short, love a guy who loves you for what you are. Love a guy who cries for you for he will love no one the way he loves you. Love a guy with whom you can share your darkest secrets and feel good about it. Love that guy for what he is and embrace his negative traits for we all know he is worth it! :)

25 Things that Every Person Should Do!

1. Read. Read a lot.

2. Write. Write everything. Write about every moment that you experience, write about every memory that is awesome, write about every moment that is not-so-awesome, write till you are lost in your words. Write till you are exhausted. Write till you know you cannot write anymore

Or even better, write a book.

3. Travel. Maintain a journal. Write down everything. Take pictures. Make memories.

4. Fall in love. 

5. Get hurt. Fall apart. Cry out loud. Push everything away. Make yourself numb and immune to all the crap happening around you.

Experience the pain. And write down how it feels! No, really.

6. Write a song. Compose it. Refrain from singing it out loud. Or may be, you should just sing. You never know!

7. Go on a sabbatical.

8. Take a break from Facebook, Twitter, Tumblr, Quora, Whatsapp, and of course, your mobile phone. It is easy. Try it.

9. Sleep a lot. Take a break from work and sleep for 48 hours straight. You know how awesome it feels?

10. Eat.A.Lot.

11. Sleep under the stars with your friends.

12. Wake up early in the morning and let the sun-rays play on the face of your loved one. Well, do you need anything more than such a beautiful sight? No, you do not!

13. Make a difference.

14. Spend a day eating a yummy chocolate cake and try not to feel guilty about the calories and all.

15. Go back-packing. Alone! Yes.

16. Quit your job. Find a job you love the most.

17. Spend all your money. Be broke.

18. Learn something new each day.

19. Slap all those idiots who ask you to 'move on.' It is so easy for people to say that. Obviously! They do not put themselves in your shoes and think, right? And if you have ever asked someone to move on..well, you know whom to slap first!

20. Talk about yourself to a stranger and let him judge you. Brutally!

And accept the criticism. Or the good stuff. ;)

21. Make promises. And promise yourself that you will fulfill every promise. After all, promises are meant to be fulfilled, isn't it?

22. Take a leap of faith and do the things that you badly want to do in spite of knowing and sensing the repercussions.

23. Shop till you drop.

24. Figure out what you need. Figure out what you want. Make a plan and make sure that everything happens according to your plan.

Make every effort to get what you want. What is the use of making plans and all when you cannot fight to achieve them?

25. Make some friends who love you. Love them back and do everything to make them happy.

So Much For A Happy Ending!

IT HAS BEEN OVER A YEAR NOW. I AM TURNING INTO A MISERABLE WRECK. CAN YOU HELP ME? My friend shouted over phone. She was moping over her long distance relationship with this wonderful guy and she asked me if I could help her. Well, really? Those were the days when I was in college, I had no clue how these long distance relationships worked out. But still, I chose stupidity over silence and gave her all dumb ideas to help her come out of the misery.

For once, I should have put myself in her shoes, and understand the trauma she was going through. I could not! 

SUNAINA, YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW BADLY I MISS HER. A MAJOR CHUNK OF MY LIFE IS MISSING AND I AM HELPLESS. I WANT TO BE THERE FOR HER, TAKE HER SHOPPING, BUY HER THE THINGS SHE LAYS HER EYES ON. I JUST WANT TO BE THERE FOR HER LISTENING TO HER TALKING ABOUT ALL THE RANDOM THINGS UNDER THE SKY. It was that wonderful guy who was smitten by the love bug and was equally suffering like my friend. It was strange to listen to a guy going all mushy-mushy yet it was amazing. I was happy for my friend. But I could not fathom why things were not working out for them. I hallucinated long distance relationships to be awesome. You know you get a lot of space, you do not have to put up with too many tantrums. Like, no drama, no trauma.

And once again, I chose stupidity over silence and lectured them on how awesome it is too be far away. Let alone long distance relationships, my knowledge in relationships was pretty slim back then. Though I refrained myself from suggesting drastic ideas, I gave them lame ideas which nearly killed them. Of course!

I still remember the bubble of joy on her face when she received his letter one day, the longing in her voice, and the disappointment in her voice when she read it. He wrote to her saying it was not working out. He told her it was to end. Both of them convinced themselves that it was meant to end. They put on strong faces, ignored friends and acted wise. They never ignored me..probably because I never asked them anything about their relationship. 

And then, one day, he spent a lot on an International call to his angelic friend (Read, Sunaina) and that probably is the best call he ever made to his friends. Says he, not me!

"I cannot stay without her."

"Umm. Really? I thought you were happy. Weren't you the one who thought it was supposed to end?"

"Let me tell you how unhappy I am."

"Do me a favour and spare me the drama. Tell me what you want to do."

"I want her back. Blah, blah. blah this, blah that, blah, blah all over again."

"Have you been listening to Avril Lavigne? Why are talking like a moron?"

"You won't understand. When you go through all this na, you will. You will no more listen to your Green Day. You will be the one listening to Mandy Moore, Avril and Kelly Clarkson. I will make fun of you then. Alright?"

"You wish, my friend, you wish."

And after all this friendly banter ended, he called her. It was one heck of a conference call and well..gulp..umm..you know..I had to put up with too much of well, you know it. And later, way too many things happened in their relationship, too many complications that I could never decipher, too much of drama that stoned me, too much of love that irked me.

It has been five years now and they are together and going stronger with every passing moment. Congratulations on getting engaged! I am so efffffing happy for you guys. XOXOXO

And anyway, aren't you like too young to be engaged? Yes, whatever!

P.S. I have been threatened and tormented horribly to write this.